How difficult is it to see a gay man in a crowd? Perhaps someone will think that this is very simple: just take a closer look at his appearance and behavior. This is partly true, but what if he is hiding his orientation? How to recognize a gay then?
After all, if you think about it, then, in addition to an unconventional view of things, they have the same features as ordinary guys. And some may even pass for ardent homophobes. Are there other signs that can reveal the truth?
Why so much interest?
For some, such thoughts are just a waste of time. But everything can change dramatically if it suddenly turns out that a loved one is gay. Think about it, because no one is immune from this, and God bless him, if this is just your friend. The situation is much worse in cases where such a truth emerges within the family.
Then everyone starts to ask the question: how did I not notice this before? Therefore, you should not ignore the information that can explain how to recognize a gay. After all, she obviously cannot harm, but it is quite possible to open her eyes to the truth.
How do gays recognize each other?
One should start with how exactly representatives of gay people find each other. And to be honest, the expression “a fisherman sees a fisherman from afar” would be appropriate here. And it's not even a matter of intuition, but of some of the "chips" that are common among gays.
First of all, this is a special greeting that may vary slightly in different regions, but it always subtly hints at what the true nature is. this person... They are also able to notice notes of hidden flirting in speech, gestures, facial expressions, and so on. The problem is that if you are not a member of their club, then most likely you will not be able to calculate a gay person based on these characteristics.
Gays who embrace their hidden desires
In general, all people with a gay orientation can be divided into two large groups: adopted their nature and hidden (latent) gays. It is just that the first category is much easier to reveal than the second, because they practically do not hide their "I" under the shell of falsehood. Therefore, their appearance can openly hint at who they are.
However, if we talk about how to recognize a gay man, then one more important point... There is such a category of people as metrosexuals. That is, those who are in love with their appearance. They also devote a lot of time to themselves and their own wardrobe and always dress like a needle. However, this does not mean their gay orientation, but only emphasizes their love for themselves.
How do you know the "wrong" guy?
How to recognize a gay if he has already accepted his true nature? Here are some clues that someone you know isn't who they say they are.
- The first step is to pay attention to the appearance. Almost all gays look after themselves: perfect hairstyle, fresh outfit, well-groomed nails and so on.
- They are always in trend. Such people follow fashion and try to buy only stylish things. In addition, quite often they independently complement their image with various accessories and trinkets.
- A special manner of speaking. If gay does not hide his nature, then he can openly flirt with men. You can also keep track of what topics a person likes to talk about. For example, if he talks for a long time about how he chose a perfume for himself or what discounts in mall, then you should think about who he really is.
- You should also look closely at those men who live a long time without relationships with girls. Naturally, personal motives may also be the reason, but the chance that he is gay is also very high.
How to recognize a latent gay man?
It is much worse with those who hide their nature not only from others, but also from themselves. After all, not every person is able to admit that he likes representatives of the same sex. However, disturbing notes can be traced even here, so let's figure out how to recognize a hidden gay.
The first thing that should raise suspicion is too violent aggression towards gays. This is due to the fact that they want to avert suspicion by all means. AND the best idea for this, it will position itself as an open homophobe.
Another piquant detail can open your eyes to the truth - all hidden gays in one way or another are drawn to male attention. For example, they love to cuddle with guys a lot, try to always sit as close as possible and hold their hand for too long when greeting. Also, many gay guys enroll in gyms and wrestling sections, since here there is an opportunity to closely contact the objects of their desire.
Still, such individuals quite often criticize girls, because they see them as competitors. This is especially true of those people who meet with guys from the environment of a hidden gay. Therefore, you should be especially careful with those who show too open aggression towards the female sex.
Is my boyfriend gay?
It also happens that gay people want to hide their addictions so much that they start a normal relationship. Because of this, it makes a lot of sense to talk about how to tell if your boyfriend is gay.
Rule one: trust your intuition. Quite often, our sixth sense whispers to us the correct answer, but people do not always listen to it. But in vain! After all, our subconscious mind notices the danger much earlier than we can imagine it.
Rule two: watch his behavior in bed. Not that gays are disgusted with having sex with a girl; rather, they cannot get full pleasure from it. Therefore, if a guy behaves in bed too tightly and insensitively, then perhaps it is worth starting to panic.
Rule three: his bathroom shelf is much larger than yours. Again, simple skin care and quality shaving foam is the norm, but if he's got a whole range of beauty products, chances are he's gay.
However, the most the right way dispel your suspicions - talk to him directly. The paradox is that such people get so tired of pretending that they sometimes give up at the first question.
And yet, where to look for these handsome men (believe me, among them, that is, now among us, there are gorgeous specimens!)? We have systematized everything for you: “attendances, passwords, other people's dachas”. But seriously, we have collected here the main options for positive communication. We are great (smiley).
Advantages of communicating “with your friends”: you can find support, get answers to questions arising from your new health situation. From those who have gone through all this before, they also (or in another way) experienced and received help. But that's not all. You can just get acquainted, have fun, chat about anything and create, forgive the pathos, families - it is also possible. Oh, and "no obligation sex," if you like. Why not? After all, HIV is not a sentence for a long time.
Come to the group
... Form: friendly communication, exchange of experience, information, but in the wake of certain simple rules that must be followed for the comfort of all group members.
... Participants: only gays with HIV, no one else is allowed to the self-help group meetings.
... Number of people: varies, usually from 10 to 20 people.
... Time and place: every Tuesday, at 19-30, Moscow, Krasnye Vorota metro station, the office of the LaSky organization, one of the activities of which is the prevention of HIV infection and other socially significant diseases among men who have sex with men (MSM). The duration of the meeting is about 3 hours.
... Group name:"Guys PLUS"
At a table in your favorite cafe
This can be a continuation of the self-help group and is often the case. After her, the guys go together to a cafe, an exhibition, a club, a cinema, agree on trips out of town, parties on river trams, etc. Further - how it will go, if you understand what it is about. In this case, everyone communicates, of course, already without the rules that are in the self-help group. At the same time, respect for each other, politeness, free format does not cancel.
But it is not at all necessary to start communicating with the self-help group and its derivatives. If you do not see the need for this, there are other options to make acquaintances among the "plus" ones. Read on.
Private Likes
POZitive BoyZ is a closed Facebook group. It's only for gay guys with HIV. Joining is possible only by invitation (for example, your friend, who is already in it).
Everything you do in this group remains in it. Participation is not visible to your other friends (those who are not in the group). Likes and posts in the group will never appear in common tape... In general, you can be calm - no disclosure of status due to joining it will happen. But you may well find your acquaintances there: Be delicate in this case.
The POZitive BoyZ group discusses both medical issues (news, etc.) and any other related to HIV, and sometimes not so much. If necessary, ask questions about diagnosis, therapy and other aspects of the disease. You will be consulted - there is someone. Just remember - everything related to health, in particular your HIV status, must be “approved” with your doctor. No self-medication and actions "on the advice of a friend", please.
... Name: POZitive BoyZ
... Content: a lot of medical information, there are invitations to thematic events, various news about HIV +
... How to get: at the invitation of a group member.
If you are closer to the people and spend a lot of time on the VKontakte network, there is a similar group called Our World - Boys. To get into it, you also need to receive a personal invitation from the participant. Inside, everything is similar: medical information, news on HIV, gay stars, etc. And of course, just positive communication and acquaintances - how can we go without it?
... Name:"Our world is boys"
... Content: medical information, news, stars with HIV, etc.
... How to get: a personal invitation of a group member is required or see information at the end of the article
... Form: website on the Internet, a platform for communication of gays, bisexuals and transgender people with HIV.
... Content: very different, including medical information, created by users.
... Number of participants: there is no data.
... How to get: independently registering and waiting for the approval of the profile.
Messengers with us
And there are also special chat rooms for "positive" gays. For example, in messengers such as Viber and Telegram. In the first, a private chat is called "Atlantis"(but its name has changed so often during its existence that no one is immune from new changes). In the second - "Country OZ"... Joining both chats - only through adding by participants.
This is not to say that in these chats everyone is only talking about HIV - not at all. Here you have stories from life, and light flirting, and even pictures of food. Naturally, there are selfies from gyms - where can we go without them? But your questions regarding status will also be answered.
Let's remind: about everything related to the disease, you need to consult, first of all, with the attending physician, follow exactly his instructions.
Chat in Viber is more "cute" or something. By the format of communication. Sometimes the degree of sweetness and sugaryness goes off scale: if you are the most kind person in the world, ready to smile all the time and be a darling - you go there.
In this sense, the Telegram chat is closer to life - there are fewer flowers and hearts (all this is a subjective vision, of course). In any case, in both chats you need to observe certain rules: rudeness, disrespect for others, swearing, porn, etc. is not approved. For systematic violations of the "routine" can be thrown out (you know how quick some of our friends are for reprisals, right?).
... Name:"Atlantis" (Viber), "Country OZ" (Telegram).
... Form: private chats in Viber messengers and Telegram.
... Content: live communication of participants in the format of a general dialogue.
... Number of participants:"Atlantis" - 100, "Country OZ" - about 70.
... How to get: an invitation from one of the participants is required or see the information at the end of the article
For those with nothing to hide
I decided that your new status- HIV + - shouldn't you hide it? This is bold for our country (and not only for ours) and may be fraught with noticeable changes in life, but we will not dissuade - everyone decides for himself. If so - join open groups on the social network "VKontakte": "I AM GAY and I am HIV +" or "HIV + I am gay, I have no need to hide it!" (oh, this teenage maximalism).
These groups are quite numerous. And since there are a lot of people, then there are enough and different topics for discussion, opportunities for flirting, dating. But, of course, as with most social communities for HIV + you can get here medical information, addresses of AIDS centers, useful Internet resources, etc. In general, the pleasant can be combined with the useful. But remember, Cinderella, that these are open groups - anyone can see that you are a member of them.
Facilities mass media do not cease to assert that on the territory of Russia gays have long ceased to be "exotic". Only in practice, this "exotic" is not particularly in a hurry to openly take to the streets of the city. Apparently, it is stopped by the mentality of the majority of citizens, who do not differ in particular tolerance towards representatives of sexual minorities. Those wishing to chat with a gay person must first find them.
Modern technologies to help
Experienced users who have spent more than one day in the wilds of the Internet space, registered in at least two or three popular social networks, without hesitation, will give the following answer to the question of how to find a gay person: "In the vastness of the virtual space, of course!" ... And they will be absolutely right. Currently, there are many Internet portals where you can easily meet, communicate and even meet in person with a homosexual you like (provided that he agrees to such a meeting). Before starting to communicate, it is usually necessary to go through the initialization process: fill out a questionnaire, confirm your email address, and so on.
Welcome to the club!
Gays for the most part do not feel very comfortable in the same territory with heterosexuals. They prefer to relax in a secluded place where others like them gather. Most often this happens in specially organized clubs. Some of them work incognito. Others do not hide the fact that the overwhelming majority of their visitors are directly related to representatives of sexual minorities.
In order to carry out our plans, it is enough to be inside the institution. The only "but": most often in such cases, strict control at the entrance is provided.
The reason for wanting to meet a gay man can be anything, but not insult or humiliation of the latter for the lifestyle that he leads. A gay man has not quite the usual physical inclinations and nothing more - otherwise he is no different from all other people.
And if an obvious gay who first appeared on the doorstep of the club can still be admitted to the "holy of holies", then the chances of an ordinary man to be there tend to zero. By the way, even a girl has much more of them if she is (or pretends to be) a lesbian.
You can also try to "catch" a homosexual near one of these places and try to get to know him. At the same time, you need to be friendly.
Detective game
Another option for meeting a gay person consists of three stages. At the first, you need to familiarize yourself with the rules for calculating those. For this purpose, it is recommended to learn more about their manner of dressing, behaving in society. Any information that allows you to identify a homosexual without verbal contact will do.
Next, you have to go out into the streets of the city and start applying the theoretical knowledge gained in practice. Having stopped attention on a potential gay, you will have to make acquaintance with him in one way or another. In this case, it is important to first make sure that the assumptions were correct, and only then make them public in front of the interlocutor. Otherwise, you can stay not only at a broken trough, but also with a broken nose: every second hetero man will be happy to bruise anyone who dares to suspect him of being "gay."
Most gays willingly go to meet the fair sex. This is due to the fact that ladies are much more tolerant than men. The friendly couple "homosexual - the fair sex" is no longer a rarity.
This is not to say that it is very easy to meet a gay person in our country. However, with a strong desire, it is quite possible. The easiest way is for people in big cities, where such phenomena are more familiar. It is much more difficult to do this in villages and distant provinces.
Dating apps are rapidly gaining popularity among the LGBT audience. After all, with their help, each owner of a communicator can very quickly find a potential partner or partner, as well as make a date “here and now”.
Grindr is the premier gay dating app and is considered a masterpiece in the evolution of gay dating. In addition to its successful use of GPS navigation, Grindr reflects the worldwide desire for ease of communication. Outwardly, the application resembles an iPhone version of a dating site: a photo, a short profile, age-height-weight, a column "about myself", online status. The only difference is that user pages are arranged according to the principle of distance from the object. Whoever is closer is the one higher on the list. Grindr's finest hour came on June 28, 2009 live on the BBC's Top Gear program. Then the popular actor and openly gay Stephen Fry demonstrated How Grindr works, hosted by Jeremy Clarkson. Not a single gay man was found in the studio using this app - the nearest one was nine miles away. “We can go there!” Clarkson yelled. Over the next week, Grindr was installed on their smartphones by 40 thousand people, and today there are more than 2 million users of this application.
The Scruff app also uses GPS and Wi-Fi capabilities to find potential gay partners. It has over 1 million users.
Maleforce
Maleforce developers went much further than their colleagues, adding an excellent chat to the program, the ability to call through a dedicated free and anonymous number as well as the function of adding to your own user profile video recordings of any, even the most frank, character. It has about 500 thousand users.
Hornet is a rapidly growing dating app in the "gay social network" format. The interface is rich in personal settings - filters, notes about the desired characters, statuses, reminders. For example, you can include your HIV status and test date. The "explore" function allows you to select the country and city where you are going to go on vacation. It has about 1 million users.
Mamba
The Mamba application is positioned by developers as largest network dating for people in Ukraine and Eastern Europe regardless of sexual orientation. With the help of Mamba, you can view profiles, write messages, and conduct microblogging. In addition, integration with dating services Mail.ru, Rambler.ru, MSN, mheart.ru, as well as social Facebook networks and Vkontakte. This application does not use GPS and Wi-Fi to find partners, but makes it possible to see users online and use search filters by interests and regions. It has over 23 million users.
Bender and Brenda
Download: Bender for iOS and Android, Brenda for iOS and Android
The developers of the application took into account the interests of male and female audiences, so Bender (for “GB-boys”) and Brenda (for “LB-girls”) were created. The creators of the application emphasize that Bender and Brenda are dating with the ability to view and send videos and voice messages... The application contains a chat with a built-in translator, advanced filters for showing interesting people, as well as a system for tracking profile views and assessing it. An additional plus: messages can be received even when the application is inactive. It has over 600 thousand users.
Lesbian dating
Female fans free version this application can view the entire base of profiles, send several types of emoticons and picture comments, receive and send messages. There is also a function of showing the marked or recently connected users on the map of the city and the world. It has about 500 thousand users.
I am looking for an interlocutor ... CHATROULET START! Stop Next
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Gay roulette video chat
I am gay and chat roulette has made my life more joyful. V videochat for gay I was able to find guys like me. Many may argue, they say, where does the chat roll, web chat for gays and online communication in general? Nowadays there are enough official gay clubs everywhere, even in Russia. But this is so if you are in Moscow, St. Petersburg or another large city. And if you live in a small village? What then? Here is video chat for gays and remains the only outlet. I found out about him quite by accident six months ago. At first, I entered just out of curiosity. I have few friends, but chatroulette still provides live communication. And then it dawned on me: after all, with his help I can find the same as me! And you can search all over the world! Since then, I went to the gay video chat roulette, got acquainted with the guy, talked, and then made it clear with hints that I was gay. The reaction was varied. Usually guys from Russia, Ukraine, Belarus were in a hurry to end their communication with me or made ugly jokes at me. But still, I have already found two Russian-speaking guys who also say that they are gay.
Then I started looking for gays in the far abroad. Here it became an obstacle for me language barrier... But the advantage of this communication tool is that you can quickly learn to speak the desired foreign language tolerably well for free. In the settings, you select a country, for example, or, and only users from these countries are shown to you. In the beginning, I must admit, it was difficult, many English and American guys ended their conversation with me, unable to understand my mecanya. But gradually, day by day, my English got better and better. I want to note that with the help of web chat for gay in communication with native speakers, his improvement is very fast, plus there are a lot of self-study guides on the Internet. In a word, after three months I was already relatively free from the USA and England.
I will say that such a communication tool seems to have been created especially for gay people. Soul mates are found very quickly. Five to ten minutes of conversation is enough to understand whether this guy is gay or not.
Now I know guys from four countries in different parts of the world, so I can communicate at least 24 hours a day. I will say more, this gay chat roulette allowed me not only to improve my English language, but also to escape from their village. At the invitation of my new friend, I visited him in the UK, in Liverpool.
Why did I write about myself? To inspire guys like me - with an unconventional sexual orientation living in small towns. And one more huge plus for gays: chat roulette can be used absolutely elementary and without registration. Everything is completely anonymous.
